Cheater-Cheater Pumpkin Eater.

Hello Readers!! I'm sorry I've been so busy, I've been in Costa Rica, and working on finals yada yada yada. Anyways I'm back! And ready for more juicy topics to talk about. I've been dying to talk about this subject for a while, but I wasn't quite sure how to address it. So as I sit here in my bed, listening to my passionate Lana Del Rey Spotify station, It finally came to me. *Sigh of Relief*.

So I bet you're wondering what this oh-so-juicy topic is? Drum roll please. . . Da-da-da-DAAAA!

CHEATING! 

As I know, many of you probably just went like this










Stay with me though! It's not going to be that awful heart-wrenching discussion about being cheated on and all the crap that comes with it. This is a discussion about two things:

1. What counts as cheating?
2. Signs they're most likely cheating on you.
. . . So let's start her off. . . Shall we? . . . . .

What counts as cheating? 

I will admit, I have been a victim when it comes to cheating. Actually, a victim multiple times; and let me tell you what. . . It blowssss. And for those of you specifically reading this. . . Yeah. Screw you. 

Cheating is a very broad or specific subject depending on the way you look at it. Some only count cheating as having complete sexual relationships with another person; others count it as flirting with another person who isn't your significant other. I think cheating is when you're unfaithful  to your boyfriend/girlfriend (whatever you are) in anyway. "Oh, it's just flirting" "Oh, it's just kissing" "Oh it's just sex". . . . ARE YOU DERANGED?! 

You're okay with the other person doing that to you?! If you just answered yes, take a moment, think about what you just agreed with. . . and get a new opinion. I'm not trying to be rude, but SERIOUSLY?! What is wrong with you? 

If your significant other, is treating other people like they treat you, maybe you should reconsider where you're at. I'm not saying it's not okay to fantasize about other people. I'll admit that even when I have a boyfriend, the sight of a shirtless Ryan Gosling makes my heart stop for a second, and I may even have small little crushes on other guys. But you won't see me over here talking to them about it. If you're going to be public about whatever it is you are with someone. . .  then you shouldn't be privately doing it with someone else. I was cheated on by an ex with multiple girls in one night, and even though they did nothing more than kiss, do you know how awful that was to find out and face? 

They way I look at it is: How would you feel if they were doing the same to you? Think about that, and whatever bothers you, then that is what you should classify as cheating. 

It annoys me when people are like "It's just flirting, it's not harming anything." 

I'm over here like "Oh yeah? How about you tell me that again when they're over there flirting with another guy/girl." 

Or 

"Well we only kissed." 

. . .So what I'm getting at is that you'd be totally okay if they were making out with someone else. . . ? Get real here. 

If you're doing anything with anyone else who isn't the person you're "supposedly together with", maybe you should re-evaluate your relationship. Once a cheater always a cheater. Stop before it's you. And stop before you hurt anyone else. I think we can all agree with "If you're not into me anymore, then break up with me." At least that way we're not going to go the rest of our lives wondering "Why was that girl/guy so much better than me?"

Number Two-Signs they are cheating:
 

From personal experience, these are a couple signs that they are cheating.

1. Avoiding Conversation: 

This is one of the most common signs. It can be for many reasons, but if it's because of cheating, one of the factors may be guilt. They're at least taking ownership of the situation. . .silently. It's hard to be normal, and yourself when you know you're guilty of something. Whether you accidentally broke your friends favorite necklace, or they let you borrow their car, and you scratched it pulling into the parking lot. The same is probably going on in their head about the cheating. They want to avoid contact with you for the fear of it being brought up. 

Another reason, is they're losing interest in you, and gaining interest in the other man/woman. It's pretty plain and simple. 

2. Avoiding seeing you: 

They're spending A LOT more time hanging out with friends, at work, alone, etc. If all of a sudden they stop spending so much time with you and are suddenly super interested in their friends and other things, even when you ask to hang out. . . Be warned!! They're distancing themselves from you either because they feel guilty, or have other things on their mind at the moment. Sometimes they could just be really busy for work or school, etc.

The best test, in my advice would be, ask them if they want you to bring them dinner, lunch etc. If they're just "home alone" and you ask them if they'd like company with their favorite foods/ movies, and they pass it up. . . you should definitely check that out. 

Talk to them, talk to their friends, etc. Don't straight up accuse them, because you don't want to be the jealous, paranoid bf/gf, but make sure they aren't two timing you either. 

3. They start texting they're "Mom"  or "Uncle Steve" a lot more than they ever did before: 

All of a sudden they have a an on-fire relationship with a family member again? I'm not saying it couldn't be relevant, or true, but if all of a sudden they're texting "Uncle Steve" or "Aunt Helen" at unimaginable amounts in the past two weeks, you should probably be a little cautious. I'm not condoning snooping, but if you snoop, I wouldn't have anything against you. If this happens, maybe bring up "How great it is they're suddenly in touch again" and see what his response is. If a family crisis occurs, or someone is getting married, having a baby etc, this is totally normal. But all of a sudden being "BFFs" with grandma? Unlikely. 

I would probably ask him  if there was anything going on with the family. If something is in fact going on, leave it, and wait to see how it plays out. If not, and if you're close enough with their family, maybe ask a sibling or parent casually. If they have no idea what you're talking about then Code Red. You need to figure out who "Grandma" is, and confront that. 

4. They start dressing up more often-smelling nice-wearing make up when they usually don't: 

Unless they have a job interview every day this week... there's obviously someone they're trying to impress. I will admit, I have my little phases where I like to dress up every day, and then I'll get tired of it again and go back to a normal wardrobe consisting of leggings, flannels, and scarfs. . . But if it's not in their normal character? Just keep a close eye on the situation and look for more signs. 

There's a lot more topics that we could discuss with cheating, but those are saved for another time. I hope this is helpful to whoever has been there, or thinks they might be there. DON'T BE A CHEATER. CHEATERS NEVER WIN. AND WINNERS NEVER CHEAT. 

Be a winner.